Steve was always going on about Luigi being cooler than Mario. I know he was just saying it to piss me off but it really got to me. One day I was moving my Nintendo and I noticed bright flashes of colour through the console’s ventilation holes. I thought it was just the complex inner workings of the gaming system but upon further inspection I could see that it was actually Mario and Luigi taking a coffee break. It was hard to understand them at first; they were talking very softly, and the Italian accent didn’t help at all. Once I'd honed in on the conversation it was actually quite clear.
“It’s a shit job,” said Luigi. “Not only are the hours long but we never know when we’re going to have to work. That dipshit could turn the game on right now.”
I was a little pissed off he’d referred to me as a dipshit.
“Calm down Luigi,” said Mario. “It could be worse. He could be one of those real gaming addicts. We only work about four days a week as it.”
“Fuck that,” said Luigi. “I know chefs that have better hours than us. I can’t believe the union doesn’t do anything.”
“You’re always going on about the union Luigi. I don’t know what you have to complain about; my role is about ten times more intense than yours.”
Before Luigi had a chance to respond he noticed my eye peering in at him. He signalled to Mario and they both sat there nonchalantly drinking their coffee. I told my friend Steve about the whole thing and he sided with Luigi. He said that anyone who enjoys their job is a dipshit. Fuck he’s such a fucking wanker.
“It’s a shit job,” said Luigi. “Not only are the hours long but we never know when we’re going to have to work. That dipshit could turn the game on right now.”
I was a little pissed off he’d referred to me as a dipshit.
“Calm down Luigi,” said Mario. “It could be worse. He could be one of those real gaming addicts. We only work about four days a week as it.”
“Fuck that,” said Luigi. “I know chefs that have better hours than us. I can’t believe the union doesn’t do anything.”
“You’re always going on about the union Luigi. I don’t know what you have to complain about; my role is about ten times more intense than yours.”
Before Luigi had a chance to respond he noticed my eye peering in at him. He signalled to Mario and they both sat there nonchalantly drinking their coffee. I told my friend Steve about the whole thing and he sided with Luigi. He said that anyone who enjoys their job is a dipshit. Fuck he’s such a fucking wanker.